The Day They Came
by Easily Forgotten
Summary: Seigaku was a peaceful school until the day one of Them showed up. That's right. Mary Sues have invaded Seigaku. How will those poor Regulars survive?
1. Sakura Marysue

**(Author's Note: Well this is my first time writing a parody so I hope it doesn't suck. While I don't encourage writing Sue I won't get mad at Suethors. Half of them don't know they're writing Sue and most are inexperienced writers. Mary Sue is a character that everyone has written at some point or another and if you say otherwise you're a liar.)**

**Standard Disclaimer: Basically I don't own Prince of Tennis, not that I think anyone would be stupid enough to think I did.**

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Once upon a time in the universe of Prince of Tennis there were nine tennis players who went to Seishun Gakuen, more commonly referred to as Seigaku. 

There was Tezuka Kunimitsu, the captain of the team who many believed to have the personality of a rock, burnt toast, a brick wall, or a stoic person. I'm not completely sure though because people could have thought he had the personality of a stoic person sitting on a rock that was on a collision course with a brick wall while eating burnt toast and still managing to look emotionless…

There was also Fuji Syusuke. He was a genius and a feminine looking male who had sadistic tendencies and smiled, a lot. Half of the team believes that he is some sort of mutant or alien because he can drink Inui Juice without out any negative side effects that can be proven, but there are rumors that Fuji was a very kind person without any traces of sadism before he came in contact with the vile substance…

Next on the list is Oishi Suichiro, the vice captain. He was the mother hen of the group, always worrying about everyone and about everything… And… that's pretty much it for him… Oh! He and Kikumaru Eiji makeup the Golden Pair which is a really good doubles team.

The last member I'll tell you about is Echizen Ryoma. I know that he isn't the last member of the team, but you'd probably get bored if I named each and every member. So I won't. I'll just assume you know who they are… or I might introduce them as they come up… maybe both… or maybe neither… I'll decide that later.

Anyway, Echizen Ryoma was a star tennis player who almost never lost because he was the main character in the manga and anime, but he doesn't know that. He was the son of Echizen Nanjiroh, a famous tennis player. Ryoma was also the only first year regular so he had a lot of trouble with fangirls.

These four men, as well as the other five who I didn't bother mentioning but will make an appearance at some point in time, had no idea what evil fate would befall them, the day _They_ came.

* * *

It was a perfectly normal tennis practice. Ryoma was being a smart mouth and crushing everyone at tennis, Oishi was worrying, Fuji was smiling, and Tezuka looked like an unhappy rock. Then they saw her. 

An astoundingly beautiful woman with absolutely _gorgeous_ ebony hair, that Snow White would envy, that cascaded _perfectly_ down her back and ending right above her marvelous hips, cherry red lips that made a rose look blue, a _divine_ figure that Aphrodite would kill for, and sparkling emerald green eyes that hinted she was a wonderful person that had a tragic background.

"Hi everyone!" Her voice was like the chorus of a thousand angels. "My name is Sakura Magnificent Astounding Radiant Young Spectacular Unbeatable Excellence, but you can call me Sakura Marysue. I'm Ryoma's cousin who came to Japan as a transfer student who can speak English, French, German, Russian, Swedish, Spanish, Latin, Chinese, Swahili, Hungarian, Arabic, Hebrew, Gaelic, Hawaiian, Portuguese-" I'm just going to cut her off for now because this list will go on for quite awhile if I don't. Just imagine she speaks every language invented. Ever. Including ones that haven't been created yet. Now back to her treacherously long monologue. "-all fluently. I originally came to Japan to visit Ryoma but along the way I'm going to beat everyone at tennis, make each and everyone of you fight over me because you're all in love with me, eventually decide that my presence will only hurt you so I decide to leave, but then you all chase after me begging me not to go so I start telling you about my angst filled past, then we all go home and everything is happy, but not for long because I am so pretty that everyone is jealous so I haven't beat all of the people who despise me and there's still the trouble of deciding who to date so I run away and Oishi runs after me and pushes me out of the way of a speeding car so then he gets fatally wounded and dies so I blame myself and start being depressed and everyone tries to comfort me but I just won't listen, then in the midst of everything I decide I love Tezuka but I think I'm too horrible of a person for him to date and I have to let him be free to travel the world as a tennis player and date better women, but he doesn't listen to me so I start to runaway and Tezuka runs into the street after me, but I see a car coming and I push him out of the way so then I become fatally wounded and I tell Tezuka that I'll always love him and die so then he cries because I died but I didn't really die it just seems like it because I was revived by his tears but he doesn't know that so I come back a few years later and Tezuka rejoices and we get married and have kids-"

Geez that girl can talk a lot, and with surprisingly few periods. But this is not her story, it's mine because I narrate it… okay maybe it is her story but nobody cares! And technically it's Ryoma's story because Prince of Tennis focuses on him. So back to the nine tennis players…

All of them were incredibly shocked at the appearance of Sakura Marysue, although you couldn't tell what Tezuka was thinking because he was currently imitating burnt toast. Her story, for those who could actually understand what she was saying, which was rather difficult because she said it all in one breath, were rather creeped out.

"Inui! Give her some juice so we can get back to practice"

Responding to Tezuka's orders, Inui, a juice maker and data man, brought out a thermos labeled 'Inui's Special Hyper Golden Technicolor Sure to Make Even Fuji Sick Recharged and Super Enhanced Iwashi Mizu Aozu'.

"Would you like to try some?" He offered the strange girl a glass of the liquid that closely resembled a Crayola 64 pack.

"Sure, thanks!" Sakura took the glass and gulped in down in one shot. Then she smiled. The Inui Juice had no affect! "Did I forget to mention that drinking Inui Juice has no negative affects on me? All it does is make the insanely beautiful me even more beautiful!"

"Something is insane but it not her good looks." Ah, good old reliable Ryoma, mouthy as ever.

"Enough! Fifty laps everyone!"

"Sorry Kunimitsu-chan. I guess I forgot to mention that since I'm such an incredible tennis player, and by that I mean better than Ryoma, Syusuke and you put together, more persistant than Suichiro and Kaoru, more powerful than Takashi and Takeshi, more acrobatic than Eiji, and smarter than Sadaharu, I'm the new captain and star of the boy's tennis team."

The boys stared at her with gaping mouths, she had just called all of them by their given names and they just met two seconds ago! Well, most of the boys were gaping; it was rather difficult to tell what Tezuka was- Oh bugger. This is getting redundant. Let's get back to Sakura Marysue then shall we. Sakura, after seeing their shocked and horrified faces felt _deeply_ hurt.

"This isn't the way this story is supposed to go!" Sakura cried! Perfect diamond tears that glittered with the light of a thousand suns escaped past her long gorgeous eyelashes and slid down her ivory cheeks. The tears didn't leave ugly streaks, instead they made her glisten like… something incredibly cheesy that's not actually made of cheese because I can't think of anything else I can compare her beauty too. "You're all supposed to obey me and hang on every word I say so that I can lead us to Nationals before I go pro! Why don't you love me!" Sakura's ebony hair turned to a deep cerulean so beautiful it made Fuji's eyes look gray and her beautiful lips trembled with utter delicacy.

"Eh! Did she just change her hair color! Nya!" Kikumaru Eiji made his first appearance in this story by pointing out the obvious.

"There's no way that's human!" Cried Momoshiro Takeshi who also decided to make an appearance.

"I believe I've heard of a creature like her." All eyes were on Inui. "There is a ninety-eight percent chance that she is a Mary Sue. Mary Sues are known to be perfect, have a tragic past, make people everywhere swoon with just her presence, and many have multicolored hair and or eyes. The people who she's encountered try to resist her beauty but they fail and many good men are lost."

"If all men swoon with her presence why are we still normal sempai?" Kaidoh, "Mamushi" if you use the Japanese name, "Viper" if you use English, Kaoru would not be outdone by Momoshiro and decided to appear now as well.

"In the beginning Mary Sues had a eighty-seven percent chance of making every man they came in contact with lovesick, but overtime they became very cliché reducing that number significantly to less than one percent. Basically the only ones who fall for her these days are extremely desperate people."

"Never in my two years of girl watching experience have I seen someone so lovely!" Satoshi Horio came on the scene and immediately fell desperately in love with Sakura Marysue, not that I'm complaining because hey, at least he shut up about his two years of tennis experience. Although now we have two years of girls watching experience to worry about…

"Thank you very much Horio-chan!" Sakura's dazzling cerulean hair turned a happy bubble gum pink to match her eyes and she smiled an elegant smile with all of her perfectly straight pearl white teeth.

"The goddess knows my name! I love you… ummm… what's your name?"

"I'm Sakura Magnificent Astounding Radiant Young Spectacular Unbeatable Excellence, but you can call me Sakura Marysue! I'm Ryoma's cousin who-" ummmm, no. We aren't listening to that again. Not that she actually said any of it again because Horio, so entranced by her beauty rushed up to Sakura Magnificent Astounding Radiant Young Spectacular Unbeatable Excellence and kissed her cherry red lips that made roses look blue. Shaking with shock and terror Sakura stuttered, beautifully I might add, before everything turned to chatspeak.

"Th-this w-wasn't s-supposed t-to h-happen. My 1st kiss wz sposd 2 b w Kuni-chan cuz we R madLE n luv w Ech othR." Her quivering angels voice shrieked a perfect shriek before promptly bursting into flames from the horror of being kissed by Horio.

"Huh? My two years of tennis experience tell me something happened." Horio's memory of the incident was completely erased.

"Everyone! Eighty-three laps! And remember, don't let your guard down!"

Finally satisfied because that accursed Sakura Marysue was gone and he could continue tennis practice, Tezuka smiled…

Okay I made that last part up. It's _impossible_ to know what Tezuka's thinking because he has the emotions of a stoic person sitting on a rock that was on a collision course with a brick wall while eating burnt toast and still managing to look emotionless.

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**(Author's Ending Notes: Well that was fun. If you're a new writer or a veteran and you're worried you might have a Sue on your hands try taking a Mary Sue Litmus Test. And yes I know there are some run on sentences but it's supposed to be like that. I also know I introduced cannon characters Japanese style and Sakura Western style, also supposed to be like that. A new chapter of this for anyone who can guess who the cool sorta OC is. I wonder how many times I used the words perfect and beautiful or a synonym of those words? Anyone want to count? ... My Author's Notes are always too long…)**


	2. Not Another One!

Once again we find ourselves at Seishun Gakuen- Oh who am I kidding. _Nobody_ calls it Seishun Gauken, or at least _almost_ nobody calls it Seishun Gakuen since I just called it that. So… Let's try that again shall we? Ahem. Once again we find ourselves at Seigaku, a disaster was barely avoided the previous week when a strange girl name Sakura Magnificent Astounding Radiant Young Spectacular Unbeatable Excellence suddenly appeared and scared the tennis out of the nine main tennis players, well actually it was the tennis players minus Kawamura Takashi. He was sick that week. Shoot! I forgot his intro!

Ahem! Again… On the Seigaku tennis team there was a boy named Kawamura Takashi who was a third year power player with spilt personalities, one was "Burning" mode and the other mode is more timid. He is also going to be a sushi chef, which is probably good because with all of his "Burning!" if he had to cook using a stove, microwave, oven, or anything that can heat food, he would be eating a lot of charcoal colored, burnt food, or he might die in a fire… but anyway… now that the intro is _finally_ done, I can get on with the story.

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Once upon another time, approximately a week after the first time Sakura appeared in Seigaku, Fuji Syusuke was talking to Kawamura Takashi.

"Fuji, did I miss anything important while I was sick?"

"Not really. We did have a new visitor, she was rather _interesting_." The prodigy known as Fuji Syusuke was smiling like usual. Sometimes people wondered if he used laughing gas, or if what their parents said was true, if you keep your face in the same expression for too long it _will_ freeze it like that. It would also explain Tezuka's lack of expression so maybe…

And I've started rambling… already… great. This story is _not_ about the different theories of random people about the facial expressions of the Seigaku Regulars! … So… anyway…

Kawamura was rather freaked out by the way Fuji said "_interesting"_ and was about to ask him to clarify the matter, even if it would scar him for life as most things Fuji clarified did, but Kawamura was curious so he didn't care… much. So, as I was saying he was _about_ to ask when a girl jumped into Fuji's arms.

This was no ordinary girl though. She was _astoundingly_ beautiful. Her hair was long and silky and held a beautiful fiery red hue. The thick, shiny hair fell in perfect ringlets down to the girl's soft, cream-colored legs. Her eyes were like chocolate caught in amber and reflected years of wisdom, experience, and pain. She looked no older than fourteen and when she smiled the heavens lit up with the light of her diamond like perfect teeth that were framed by cotton candy pink lips.

"SYUUUUUUUUUUSUUUUUUUUKEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" Even the voice of the mysterious girl echoed perfection, even if she was screaming.

Bleh! I can't believe I'm narrating this junk! Ugh! It makes me want to puke! Who makes me say this stuff! I don't even have a decent dental plan or pay! I should have listened to my mother and gone to college. Oh well, at least I'm not flipping burgers at Mc Donald's… And now I will stop complaining, for now. Back to the puke worthy girl… Oh joy…

"SYUUUUUUUUUUSUUUUUUUUKEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!" The excited girl bounced up and down in poor, poor Fuji's arms, which was quite a feat considering her attire.

She was wearing insanely tight denim micro mini skirt, an insanely tight black sleeveless shirt and insanely high stiletto black heels, but her outfit showed off her insanely perfect figure. Simply put, this girl was insane, and I'm not only talking about her choice of outfit.

"Excuse me, but I don't know who you are. Perhaps you're looking for a different Syusuke." Fuji was freaked out, but he still didn't stop smiling and hoped the strange girl was looking for someone else.

"Of course not!" Cried the girl, now upset at being thought to be wrong. "Fuji Syusuke how can you not remember _**me**_! Sakura Marysue! I'm Eiji's long lost twin sister who was engaged to Atobe Keigo-chan but he cheated on me so I turned to anorexia and wound up in the same hospital as Yukimura Seiichi where we fell head over heels in love but he put his tennis team before me so I ran away from the hospital and became an Olympic gymnast, but then some girls who were jealous of me because they weren't as pretty as me, talented as me, and have an IQ of forty bazillion like me pushed me off the balance beam while I was inventing a super complicated new flippy-thingy and I broke my leg so I felt devastated and went to Munich, Germany where I met Tezuka but I was afraid to fall in love but Tezuka convinced me and then we started dating, but then Tezuka started ignoring me so I came home to Japan where I met you and we fell in love and we're going to get married! Oh! And did I mention I'm an ex-model, a billionaire, the inventor of toothpaste, and I created tennis, so I'm naturally the best."

It seem's like Sakura Marysue is related to… Sakura Marysue. They even share a love of not breathing and not using periods!

Fuji was now thoroughly scared, but he was _still_ smiling. "Sakura Marysue? … Didn't you burst into flames when Horio kissed you?"

"Oh no silly Syu-Syu! That was Sakura Magnificent Astounding Radiant Young Spectacular Unbeatable Excellence; I'm Sakura Marvelous Amazing Ravishing Yearning Surprising Unattainable Extravagant! We're stepsisters! We share the same mom, her name's Authoress and she's awesome! Now, can we get back to me?"

Fuji visably twitched at the nickname Syu-Syu. He was not like Tezuka who had less emotion than a brick wall, he was Fuji Syusuke, and he was getting annoyed. He dropped Sakura so that she was no longer in his arms, but rather on the pavement. Then with his cerulean eyes filled with anger he glared a Fuji glare.

Kawamura who was watching the whole ordeal quietly started backing away slowly when he saw the glare that Fuji was giving Sakura. He was almost frightened into burning mode and was seriously considering transferring schools.

"Ouch! Syu-Syu that hurt!" Sakura's eyes filled with glistening tears and her hair, apparently much like her sister's changed color. "Why does the world hate me? How could Syu-Syu be so mean? This isn't how this is supposed to be." Sakura Marysue pulled out a book from… somewhere. Seriously, where would she be keeping a book? I want to know! Humph!

Ahem… Sakura pulled out a book from somewhere and shoved it in Fuji's face. When Fuji first looked at the cover, it seemed like something Michelangelo would create.

"This is my hand drawn book about us Syu-Syu. I wrote it myself!"

Upon closer observation, Fuji decided that it looked like a stick figure creation that a first year in elementary school would draw. The book was title The Life of Sakura Marvelous Amazing Ravishing Yearning Surprising Unattainable Extravagant. The first few pages Sakura flipped through were stick figures acting out the story she told earlier which I will not repeat for fear of readers falling asleep before the end of this story. If they do fall asleep, I don't get full pay. Then came the part where the Fuji stick figure came into play.

The stick figure of Fuji, who will be referred to as Stick Fuji from now on, was following around Stick Sakura like a lovesick puppy, singing songs, writing love poems, and beating guys who looked at her to pulp in tennis, which if you think about it wouldn't really do anything, but whatever... At least I don't have to narrate _that_ story. It wouldn't be worth it even if it had a good retirement plan. Anyhow… Then a talking bubble appeared and Stick Fuji declared his undying love for Sakura Marvelous Amazing Ravishing Yearning Surprising Unattainable Extravagant. I _would_ read to the end with the wedding, but I already feel sick from the beginning and middle… and Fuji burned the book before it got that far.

Seeing the book made Fuji angry. His glare changed from a Fuji glare to The Patented Fuji Glare, a glare that only Fuji Syusuke can perform and not only because he has the copyright.

Alas, Sakura must have been a demon or some other strange thing like that which is evil because nothing good is _that_ annoying, for the Patented Fuji Glare did not cause her to burst into flames with a scream of agony.

Not all hope was lost though. The glare paralyzed her buying enough time for Fuji to slip a racket into Kawamura's hand. Burning Taka was ready and more than willing to help Fuji with his pest problem. Taka-san rushed to the nearest tree and chopped it down using his karate skills.

The tree leaned to the right, then the left, then right again, teetering back and forth until it collapsed on top of Sakura Marysue who was still paralyzed from the Patented Fuji Glare. However, this girl wasn't a mere mortal. Like I said before Sakura must have been a demon or some other strange thing like that which is evil because nothing good is _that_ annoying. And no, Horio does not count as good. He's just… there.

Instead of being crushed by the giant tree Sakura had puppy dog eyes as she tried to push the large tree off her. Exasperated since the annoying girl didn't die and amused at the pitiful expression on her face, Fuji decided to do what he did best. Yes, I know that Fuji does _everything_ well, so to make things clear he wanted to take a picture of today's current events, meaning Sakura with a tree on top of her.

Fuji took out his shiny, sleek, black camera and took a picture of the struggling girl. His camera was digital so he could see exactly what the picture looked like. As usual it was perfect. Everything was like real life. Sakura was _astoundingly_ beautiful. Her hair was long and silky and would have held a beautiful fiery red hue but it didn't because her had turned black because she had gotten depressed. The thick, shiny hair fell in perfect ringlets down to the girl's soft, cream-colored legs. Her eyes were like chocolate caught in amber and reflected years of wisdom, experience, and pain. When she smiled the heavens lit up with the light of her diamond like perfect teeth that were framed by cotton candy pink lips.

Of course though, she wasn't smiling. Honestly, who would be smiling while they're trapped under a tree? Actually, it looked like the little digital Sakura was trying to push the tree off… Wait! It _was_ Sakura trying to get rid of the tree! I can't believe it! The tribal people were right! Cameras really do steal your soul!

Not wanting to make the campus dirty and making sure that Sakura Marvelous Amazing Ravishing Yearning Surprising Unattainable Extravagant's body was actually dead, Fuji took some unused Inui Juice that he used to scare the other children or else randomly carried around out of his tennis bag and poured it over Sakura's perfectly dead frame. Then, he grabbed some matches he stole from the chemistry lab and lit said perfect frame on fire. It burned bright orange which would have been the gorgeous color of Sakura's hair except Sakura's hair had turned dark blue, not that it mattered anyway because does anyone _really_ care about her? Fuji then gathered the ashes in a jar to give to Inui. Surely he'd be able to find _some_ use for them. Most likely he'd make a new juice. Why Fuji would want him to make a juice out of ashes is one of the mysteries of the world, or he just wanted to see the faces of the Regulars after he told them what was in it.

Smiling at a job well don, Fuji Syusuke went home to annoy his little brother Fuji Yuuta who had come home because Fuji Yumiko, their older sister, had made a raspberry pie. Of course since Yumiko is a Fuji, her pies are better than everyone's with the possible exception of other Fuji's.

* * *

The next day Kawamura was watching the news when an interesting segment came up.

_A young girl with red hair that could change colors disappeared yesterday. Her name was Sakura Marvelous Amazing Ravishing Yearning Surprising Unattainable Extravagant and was last seen headed towards Seishun Gakuen. That is all for this story because no one really cares about it. In other news, the author Nami Mitsukai will be changing pennames on June 14, 2007, to The Rambling Narrator…_

When the segment about the weird girl from the day before ended Taka-san left for school. Echoes of his mother "Burning" were heard a few blocks down. Unfortunately for Takashi his mom made breakfast so it turned out charcoal-like. Hey, he had to get "Burning Mode" from somewhere and it's obviously not from his dad.

And as Kawamura Takashi walked off into the sunrise, he couldn't help but laugh at the odd misfortune that befell Fuji Syusuke, the one who usually causes such odd problems and being thankful that he had been sick and did not see the first Sakura. That is, he _was_ laughing until his stomach growled from not eating breakfast, so he went to the nearest vending machine and bought a Ponta, the drink of tennis players! And thus, my current narration ends. Remember! On June 14, 2007 Nami Mitsukai's penname will be changed to The Rambling Narrator. _Now_ my narration is done… I hate my job… I want a dental plan!

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**(Author's Note: Hi people! Yes I will be changing names, the news bulletin was for people who don't bother reading AN's. Sorry it took so long to come out, but it's hard to think of ways to kill off Mary Sue's and my computer randomly shut off before I had saved everything. If anyone knows any good English words that begin with the letter Y I would appreciate someone telling me some new ones I can use for excessively long names. Thanks to all reviewers and KiriharaAkaya for pointing out some errors I had. If you want to know what they were, read the reviews. Hope you enjoyed reading!)**


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